Reaction so far

So far so good. I was able to go to a worship evening yesterday at church. Today I have started to get tired easily again. Had to take a nap in the day and my taste buds have started to change again. I don't think I have mentioned this before. Around day 3, my taste buds change drastically. Water tastes horrible and metallic in taste. A cup of tea also tastes horrible. I can't taste a lot of my foods and I crave quite strong tasting foods. It also means that I don't want to eat much because food doesn't taste of anything to me. This lasts for about a week and then around week 2 after chemo, my taste buds go back to normal and I want to eat food again. Please keep praying/thinking of me to not have any bad side effects this time. Last one, I am hoping to just sail through it.

Went ok

No funny reaction today! It all went smoothly. And my picc line was taken out. Yeah! No more tube in my arm that I have to be careful to not get wet in the shower. Phew.

And I am home now and I feel very normal!

Looking forward.....

I am so happy that this is my last chemo session. As much as the care from the nurses have been great, I will not miss the chemo area with all the patients sat round hooked up to machines and the equipment all beeping away. It all just says sickness. I am sat here now waiting for my last session. 

I am looking to getting past all the weird drugged up feelings too. A few more weeks and I will be normal again. 

Last bout of chemo

Last lot of chemo this Friday. Hooray. The end is near.

I think I may have conjunctivitis too, though I am not 100% sure. I have seen 3 doctors and 2 of them say it is, the other says that my watery eyes is a side effect of my treatment. And a nurse has said that it's probably a side effect. I don't know who to believe! Though it doesn't matter, it's just annoying. I am wiping my eyes most of the day and it looks like I am crying all the time. Because of all the water and wiping, my eyes are getting tired very easily so I want to close them a lot. I am trying every method I know to get rid of it. Eye drops, saturating cotton wool with cooled boiled water with salt, same thing again, but with cooled camomile tea and putting cucumber slices on my eyelids every so often. I'm not sure if anything is working. They are just streaming all the time. It also might be hay fever as I know that the pollen count was high recently. Who knows. All I know that if it is a side effect then I may be like this for a few more weeks yet!

Also I have just arranged with work to go on sick leave. I find it very unproductive to be off work so regularly. I am unable to achieve a lot and it's not good for the organisation. They will get someone else in to do my work whilst I am off. My sick leave will begin from the day of my surgery until the end of my treatments, which is for at least 3 months if not 4 months. I will be paid full pay for some of the time I am off and half pay for the rest. I hadn't realised that I was able to do this, and thought that I would at least would need to go part time to maintain income coming in. I am relieved to know that I have the option to just be fully on sick leave as I am not just tired physically. I am also mentally tired from trying to keep up a work life in between being sick. I am psychologically tired as a lot has happened to my family this year so far, and I am struggling to process it all. And I am sure that I am probably tired in other subconscious ways that I am not aware of, but still feel. Work has also been emotionally taxing, because we are going through massive management changes. And whenever things of this magnitude happens in a company, inevitably there is confusion, lack of clarity of changes and staff uneasiness. It has been really tough coming into work these last few months, and it can't be good my health.

I am looking forward to just stepping away and concentrating on getting better. 

Good news!

It was my birthday yesterday and I had to go in for an important leaders' meeting in the morning but then I went for a birthday lunch of Moraccan lamb with my parents and brother. 

Then I went to see my breast care doctor. He gave me the best birthday present ever. He told me that by his assessment, the chemo has shrunk 40% of the cancerous lump!! Thank God! He even used the word 'tiny.' It's a tiny lump now. Tiny. Tiny! It used to be a 2cm lump but now it is 12mm!! That IS tiny! Now some of you may be thinking - the original lump of 2cm doesn't sound that big either. But it's in relation to me. I'm a petite lady and so therefore my boobs aren't that big either and a 2cm width lump with depth and being in the smack bang middle of my right breast was significant enough for them to speculate that I may have to have a mastectomy. When the doctor first said that word a few months I was horrified. But no need now! No M word for me!!!! Hooray!

I am going for a MRI scan tomorrow for the medics to assess more deeply the effect of the chemo. I am scheduled for surgery on 25 July and then I will also have radiotherapy 4 - 6 weeks every day for 5 weeks.

This is a very good result and I am over the moon. Thank you God for you are good!

Checking in with my Breast Care Doctor

As I am coming to the end of my chemo treatments, I am seeing my doctor tomorrow to discuss the next stage of treatment - surgery and radiotherapy. Though currently I don't know in what order. It is quite frustrating to have the whole of 2014 mapped out and dominated by different types of treatments. It's makes planning very difficult. I feel like I am in an invisible waiting room, not allowed to go out and play. However I am thankful that the losing of my hair has happened in the summer when it is not so cold. I have started to lose my eyebrows and eyelashes too. My lower eyelashes have nearly all dropped out. Very bizarre. I should hopefully have some hair back by the autumn!

Please pray that the chemo will have shrunk the cancerous lump in my body and that therefore that if they are going to operate on me that they will not have to take too much from me.

Still doing well

Relatively speaking, I am doing well. I started to feel some side effects yesterday. Achy bones, fatigue and my taste buds being off. But these are not too bad as I could be worse. I am benefiting from your thoughts and prayers. Thank you. Let's see how the rest of the week goes!

5th chemo better than last time

Had my chemo yesterday. This time the chemo going in wasn't as bad as last time. I still had a funny reaction where I went very red from my chest to the top of my head and the nurses and doctor stopped the treatment. Again they waited for half an hour before restarting again at a slower rate. 

But unlike last time it was alright going in. Last time the pre-medication made me so drowsy that the whole time the treatment was going in, I felt so uncomfortable and wanting to sleep but couldn't get comfortable on the lazy chair because it didn't lie flat. But this time I was ok to sit up whilst the treatment was being fed in. 

Today I felt fine and went to a farm day with Kalun and Nuri. We had a great time! The sun was out and there were animals to see and lots of activities for Nuri to do. He was quite hungry when we came home as he had been running around seeing things and playing. After dinner I started to feel tired so I am off to bed already! It was a good day. 

5th chemo

Penultimate cycle of chemo this Friday. I'm dreading it especially after what happened last time. I went to see my chemo doc today and told her what happened and she is prescribing strong painkillers for me. This is giving me some hope that it will be more bearable this time.